really. what year is it?

I got up this morning (much earlier than ever) to try and get some work done, but alas I got distracted by my rss feeds (and now by blogging - man, a girl knows how to procrastinate).

The first thing I notice was that there was a cross burning last weekend 30 minutes from my home. The local paper could barely expend 3 short paragraphs on it. And it's in today's paper... three days later. Meanwhile, Northern Illinois University was closed on Monday because someone wrote "tell those n****** to go home" and "the VA tech shooters messed up with only having one shooter" on a wall. Don't they say it usually gets worse before it gets better? I hope this is one of those times. better. soon. please.

be bold be red

Remember the fright associated with Halloween when you were a kid? Not only was fear of razor blades in apples invoked in you but the ever present fear of ghosts, goblins and witches was at its highest on this night.

Do you know what its like to be afraid, like really afraid? The kind of afraid where you can't open your mouth because if you do either no words will spill out or you'll scream... and neither will help you survive? The kind of fear that overwhelms your sanity and takes over your every movement/thought/breath? The kind of fear that makes you sick... like when you eat too much Halloween candy?

Do you know what it's like to be told "it's just your imagination" or "you're being silly" or "stop telling stories"? Why is it that on Halloween, fear is fun, violence is imaginary and kids ask adults for a trick or a treat?

Be bold be red is taking back halloween, and calling it what it is: "Halloween is about “fake” and “imagined” terrors, the violence committed against women of color is very “real.” Not only is it a “real” reality on October 31st, but it’s also a “real” terror for the rest of the year."

Documentthesilence.wordpress.com documents some of the recent incidences of violence against women of color and urges folks to wear red on Wednesday, October 31st. The site lists rallies and other actions going on around the country and lists a variety of resources for women of color and their allies in the movement to end violence and stop the silence.

do you know what it means to miss new orleans?

When St. Louis was hit by a bad thunderstorm last summer, I didn't have power for a week. I was miserable. It was hot as hell out and barely anything was open because they didn't have power either. My partner had to drive 30 minutes to get ice. I was struck by the lack of empathy of those around me, who were lucky enough to have power. "So what? You didn't have air conditioning as a kid, did you? You survived then!" People failed to remember that not having electricity affects the ability to have a lot of other things... like a fan, a fridge, an alarm clock, a radio, a tv.... you get the picture.

When Katrina hit New Orleans, no one had any idea the impact it would have immediately or long term... and a lot of people have no idea, two years later, the impact it had on people's homes, lives, livelihood. After the storm, people had climbed up to their attic, hoping to be saved and died of the heat while waiting if they didn't drown. People did not have electricity for seven months.... if not more. People's lives were ruined, they lost everything they owned, their friends and family members were scattered all over the country, and insurance companies refused to help (because people had hurricane insurance and not flood insurance, and obviously, the damage was caused by a flood and not a hurricane). And our government failed to help...

and so did you and I.

I talked to a woman last week who went down to New Orleans for the two year anniversary - she talked to lots of folks who were working on their houses and they'd come home one day to find their house had been bulldozed with no notification.... this is after all of their belongings had sat in 12 feet of water and they spent almost two years trying to prove to the bureaucracy that they owned the property.

Sadly, I've never been to New Orleans but hopefully that will change. We just finished watching Spike Lee's documentary "When the Levees Broke". Please, if you haven't seen it already, go rent it.

We also ran across a short video that was in the 7th Annual Media That Matters Film Festival called "Still Standing", a youth produced doc you can watch with one woman's story - there's a longer version that can be ordered, with more stories.

This is the stuff that matters.

yes. he said that.

Last night, after a day of training and seeing the new documentary about the US Occupation in Iraq: No End In Sight, my partner and I went to a popular pizza place in the south city neighborhood of St. Louis for dinner. It's a crowded place and not only does it take an hour to get a pizza, it takes about that long to get a place to sit. My partner and I were having a beer, chatting and standing by an old-school bowling game and I kept noticing this guy staring at us. He was with his girlfriend, but not paying much attention to her, and paying way too much attention to us. He was white, built, and had obviously been drinking. I felt uncomfortable, but ignored him, and eventually we went into the other room to see if we could find a table. We found a table, near an obnoxious group of early 20-somethings. My partner went up to the bar to get another drink, and noticed that a table was opening up. She pointed, and I quickly went over there so we could get this booth before any one else. It was where the previously mentioned guy and his girlfriend had been sitting, and they got in line behind my partner to pay their bill while I set my coat down on the booth to save it for us.

I could tell that this guy was saying something to my partner, but couldn't tell what. I stood standing, about a foot from him, and he finally turned around and started to say something to me, but his girlfriend tugged on him and told him to be quiet.

This is the conversation that had ensued, as reported to me by my partner, went something like this... She is MP (my partner) and he is TG (the guy):

MP: Hey, are you guys leaving?
TG: Why? Do you want to come with us?
MP: No, I want your booth.
TG: Why don't you just come with us? I can beat off while you two get it on.
MP: Uh.. no thanks.
TG: Come on, why not? Or would you prefer that she (he points to his girlfriend) beats off instead?

At this point, his girlfriend had pleaded enough that he shut up. They left, to go home to their (un)happy home, and we were stuck with... who says that? how do we live in a world where someone says that? Now this guy didn't harm us physically, but he attacked our sense of safety in a way that he will never understand.

In my work, I work with guys like him all the time. People say, "I don't know how you do it" - I say, "thankfully, someone is..." and the guys I work with are actually in a program that is challenging their abusive and/or violent behavior. This guy... probably isn't... but hey, maybe I'll see him again sometime, for 48 weeks of his life.

visualizing safety

there's an activity I do when leading a training about violence, oppression or violence prevention. in fact, I just facilitated it yesterday... I believe it comes from a Paul Kivel curriculum. It goes like this:

Close your eyes for a moment, get comfortable in your chair, and imagine a place in the world where you feel completely safe. Stay with the first place that comes to mind... the most important thing is that you feel completely safe and unafraid. Think about what it feels like to be in this place. Without opening your eyes, look around in this place. What do you see? How do you feel? How does your body feel? What makes this place safe? This is a place you can go in your mind when you need to feel safe. This is your sanctuary - a place where you can be protected from anyone or anything that might harm you...

After a few moments of silence, I have the group open their eyes. Then, I ask them to draw their safe space. If the group knows each other relatively well, I ask them to share something about the visualization or their safe space. I ask, "how would this world be different if everyone felt completely safe?" How would they feel? What would they do?

The conversation basically leads itself after this. We eventually get to the point that feeling safe is a privilege... one that not many people don't have access to. One time when I lead this activity, a young woman left the room crying. I was told today by one of the participants, that yesterday when she was asked to draw her safe space... she drew a question mark.

What do you think about safety being a privilege? I'd love to hear your thoughts... or even better, where is your safe place? what do you visualize when you think of a safe place?

a day in the life of a scooter newbie - random apolitical post

Today was the first day I took the Honda Ruckus out of the neighborhood. I rode about 10 - 15 miles total. I had barely gotten the Ruckus out of the garage when a guy working in the yard across the alley asked "what type of scooter is that?" "how many ccs?" "how fast does it go?" "how much did that cost you?"... this was after he said, "I didn't know anyone lived in that house!" Hmmm... the 80 lb. dog that spends a lot of time in the yard didn't give it away?

I rode to work. All the construction workers working on my new offices were impressed... three of them commented on it... all three of them asked at different points during the day "what type of scooter is that?" "how many ccs?" "how fast does it go?" "how much did that cost you?". One of them told me about the bike he wants... 1000ccs. The Ruckus has 49. Hmmm.

Then I went to get a pedicure (yes, you read that correctly - it's my second one ever! my first was in Mexico in 2004). After another (walk-in) customer got all upset because they took me before her (i had made an appointment), I was sitting in the massage chair getting my feet soaked (um, why haven't i done this more in my life?) when a guy walked in to the nail salon and said "whose bike is that out there?" i raised my hand tentatively and he, you guessed it, asked "what type of scooter is that?" "how many ccs?" "how fast does it go?" "how much did that cost you?". He went on to want to know where he could get one. I told him we bought ours on ebay from a guy that didn't live too far away. He asked me where that was. I told him it was on the internet. This perplexed him and he walked away -- and left the nail salon. When he first walked in, I was hoping he was going to get a mani and a pedi... but no.

i can't remember the last time that i got this much attention from men...

this. american. life.

Believe it or not, my first opportunity to write in a long time has come on an unexpected day off. i would be working right now, but can't due to some city bureaucratic bullshit, which is a mixed blessing. Anyway, i'm taking time this morning to listen to this week's podcast of This American Life. The episode originally aired in 2002 and is called '81 Words' and explores "how and why the American Psychiatric Association decided in 1973 that homosexuality was not a disease". 1973 was not all that long ago. Listen to it if you have a chance, it's great, and contains the kind of activism I wish we had going on today. It also gives me hope that other kinds of needed changes can happen within my lifetime.

oh, and to get the episode for free, you have to download it this week.

now this is a government that puts people over profit

so i've talked before about some of my concerns with the pharmaceutical companies... i was about to leave for work this morning when a headline caught my eye that i had to write about. Thailand has figured out how to be able to better provide affordable or no-cost drugs for HIV and heart conditions.

a (literal and figurative) dangerous (not so recent) trend

60 Minutes reported last week on 'stop snitchin'', you can watch a bit of the report, among other video clips, if you're interested. This discussion goes back to a previous post of mine... and, actually, a 30 page paper I wrote in graduate school (though the paper I wrote was specifically about immigrants and crime reporting). But really, what incentive is there to report crime? And what about for people who have no reason to trust the police will help them? Is this self-destructive, self-protective or a little bit of both?

ramblings and thoughts about the Virginia Tech shootings

i'm sad that we live in a world where a fatal 'domestic dispute' on a college campus is no cause for alarm. A white student named Emily and a black student named Ryan were shot... domestic dispute or not... this is cause for alarm. Regardless, there was no way they could have expected or assumed that the campus needed to be shut down... and I'm not at all saying that it should have been. I've just been irritated that every news report I hear says the police thought it was "just a domestic dispute" over and over again. Like shrug, another day at the office. Any violence should be a cause for alarm in my world... I've discovered over the past few days that there were other issues at play. My pal wrote a bit about this issue and with her permission, I'm pasting it here:

I think, actually, that their decision is more a reflection of information they have based on what has been, and not on the changing nature of our culture. What happened yesterday was an anomaly of what we have known. But it is not nearly such an anomaly of what we are becoming - placed in context of the overall level of violence in our culture - mobility, access to guns, stress, entitlement, rage, a completely meritless war, warped construction of masculinity laced with violence that depends on the oppression of women for the roots of its construction, the most powerful man in the world blatantly acting in irrational, disrespectful, and oppressive ways, AND the continuing hate against women that entitles men to express their rage by using all of the means that are now at their finger tips.

In addition, it turns out that another reason they didn't respond was this "person of interest", a man they were questioning (Emily's boyfriend) as a possible suspect... because Emily's roommate had divulged that he (the boyfriend, named Karl Thornhill) had guns and that she had gone with him recently to a shooting range.

i'm overwhelmed with the ache I feel for everyone that has been affected directly or indirectly by this... the victims, their families, the survivors, other students that no longer feel safe at their schools, every person who feels sick to their stomach or ache in their heart about this tragedy. And yes, believe it or not, I even feel ache for Cho Seung-Hui.

i'm angry that the media continues to miss or discuss how so many school shootings (a) are often directed against girls or women and (b) could have be prevented. This is an opportunity - but it's not used as such.

Notice I wrote, 'directed against girls or women'... not because of girls or women. Day before yesterday, an Australian paper started their article about the shootings with a picture of 18 year-old Emily Jane Hilscher, the first victim, and printed "THIS is the face of the girl who may have sparked the worst school shooting in US history." Um, hold the phone (as my grandma used to say). WHAT? She sparked it? I just noticed that the paper has noted the negative reaction to the author's language. They insist they were not trying to blame Emily for being shot. The problem is this is what always happens. Her skirt was too short, what was she doing out at that time of night, etc. Even though, Cho Seung-Hui wrote a note that said "you caused me to do this" - it was not in fact caused by anyone or anything but Cho Seung-Hui and more so, the US's addiction to violence. And also, to be clear, this is the worst school shooting in history... not the worst shooting in history (as some have asserted)... ask the native people.

Ok, so the last time I checked, each individual is responsible for his or her own actions. I believe that a person who takes responsibility or holds him or herself accountable for his or her actions is the standard we should set, is how we should socialize our children. Say a lamp falls off of a table, every child within 10 feet of the lamp yells "I didn't do it!" We need to raise our children to say, "it was me, I'm sorry, I'll clean it up". And as adults, we need to acknowledge the accountability and have fair and consistent consequences. But we don't. We raise our children to blame one another. Then are children grow up with the guilt and shame of believing things completely out of their control were their fault (parent's divorce, sibling's sexual abuse, their own sexual abuse, a pet's death... you get the point).

Boys are allowed to be angry, not sad - and never to cry. Boys are allowed and sometimes expected (in the US) to externalize their anger with violence... whereas girls, aren't allowed to be angry and since they have every reason to be pissed off as hell, they tend to internalize their anger (which manifests in the form of eating disorders, self-mutilation, low self-esteem, etc.).

But then when an angry young man (not originally from the US) is responsible for the worst shooting in history, we have to find out why? Why would this man do this? He had a history of stalking women, was suicidal at times and was sent to counseling. His writing tutor was so afraid of him she had an assistant with her when she tutored him.

Another article I ran across, shed a little more light on some of the warning signs. One of his professors, sassy poet Nikki Giovanni, said of his violent writings:

"It was not bad poetry. It was intimidating," poet Nikki Giovanni, one of
his professors, told CNN Wednesday.

"I know we're talking about a youngster, but troubled youngsters get drunk
and jump off buildings," she said. "There was something mean about this boy.
It was the meanness - I've taught troubled youngsters and crazy people - it
was the meanness that bothered me. It was a really mean streak."

Giovanni said her students were so unnerved by Cho's behavior, including
taking pictures of them with his cell phone, that some stopped coming to
class, and she had security check on her room. She eventually had him taken
out of her class, saying she would quit if he was not removed.

His fellow students were "waiting for him to do something":

"When we read Cho's plays, it was like something out of a nightmare," former
classmate Ian MacFarlane, now an AOL employee, wrote in a blog posted on an
AOL Web site.

"The plays had really twisted, macabre violence that used weapons I wouldn't
have even thought of."

He said he and other students "were talking to each other with serious worry
about whether he could be a school shooter."

"We always joked we were just waiting for him to do something, waiting to
hear about something he did," said another classmate, Stephanie Derry. "But
when I got the call it was Cho who had done this, I started crying,
bawling."

Something tells me that there's a reason his writings were "like a nightmare". Something tells me his life was a nightmare to him, a nightmare he wanted to end. It's awful that he had to create a nightmare to end his own.

So Ms. Cambio, a.k.a. Ms. Violence Prevention? What have you got for us? What is the answer?

Well, my gut tells me this could have been prevented. Even though he was hospitalized at one point, and obviously was potentially dealing with some major mental illnesses, he did not get the help he needed. (oh right, boys aren't supposed to get help, especially not from a therapist) It's hard for anyone, especially someone that's extremely troubled, to establish enough trust in a short period of time to have therapy actually be helpful. As a country we need to be more proactive and less reactive when it comes to violence. I don't want getting onto a university campus to become akin to getting on an airplane. But, of course, I don't want anything like this to ever happen again. Where's the middle ground?

If I had the time and the energy, I'd like to analyze all of these school shootings sites listed on the school violence resource center website and see if we can glean any potential prevention points. Maybe they've done that already. Anyone looking for a dissertation topic?

All I know is, we need more violence prevention programs (if you want to know of some good programs to donate to, let me know), and fewer guns. Please. The early shootings, even before Columbine, should have inspired some change... and by change, I'm not talking about more security, metal detectors or banning black trench coats. Why does it have to come to this? Please, please, please let me see a world, in my lifetime, where prevention is made a priority. For our children, for our grandchildren, for ourselves.

men ending violence in high heels

i'm not really about awareness months, as i believe we should be aware and talking about these issues every month. However, this morning, as part of my new job (uh.. the job that has made it nearly impossible for me to keep blogging every day), I participated in an event called Walk a Mile in Her Shoes. Today was a cold and rainy day but still a lot of people came out to walk and we received many donations and pledges - money that will support organizations (like mine) that are working to end violence. As part of the event, men don a pair of high heel shoes and literally walk a mile in them. There will be walks all month throughout the country, check if your city is doing one. The walk came out of the United Gender Movement and the International Men's March to stop Rape, Sexual Assault and Gender Violence. This movement is looking for ways to include men in the movement to end violence against women. Too often people working in the field of domestic and sexual violence are all women.

There are a lot of organizations that are men actively working to end violence, including Generation Five, One in Four (previously called No More), Men Ending Rape, Men Stopping Violence, A Call to Men, and several more. I commend the men involved in these (and other like-minded) organizations. Violence can't end without it (and while it gets good publicity, walking in high heels isn't enough...)

So if you want to be part of the movement, contact a local anti-violence agency and inquire about volunteering. If you live in the US, the National Sexual Violence Resource Center has a list of state coalitions - or you can check the list posted on the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence website. Some states have joint sexual & domestic violence coalitions, while others have coalitions specific to each issue. Either site is a good place to start to find a local place. If you can't volunteer, make a donation -- every little bit helps.

Ok... stepping off my soapbox now. Oh wait, isn't that what blogs are for?

global warming is great! when you have access to air conditioning...

A report released today by the Intergovermental Panel on Climate Change (a UN Panel) has proclaimed that poor people will be hurt most by global warming, aka climate change. Hmmm... that's weird. It never works out that the people with the least power to change something are the most affected...

The report states that:

• Observational evidence from all continents and most oceans shows that many natural systems are being affected by regional climate changes, particularly temperature increases.
• A global assessment of data since 1970 has shown it is likely that anthropogenic warming has had a discernible influence on many physical and biological systems.
• Other effects of regional climate changes on natural and human environments are emerging, although many are difficult to discern due to adaptation and non-climatic drivers.
  

Check out the interactive map on the BBC website.


PS. If you haven't seen An Inconvenient Truth... uh, you should -- no matter what you think about Mr. Gore.

nine million children would vote if they could

if you haven't heard already, there is a ten year-old running for President of the United States. Ok, so not really but check out the website anyway. The Children's Defense Fund (CDF) has started this campaign to increase awareness about the nine million children in the U.S. without health insurance and to encourage people to contact Congress about the All Healthy Children Act (H.R. 1688) which would insure children and pregnant women.

i'm all about creative ways to get people's attention and respect the CDF but since I just got back from facilitating a training about positive youth development, i'm a little annoyed by the tokenism. That didn't stop me from signing the petition though... and not just because my mom's maiden name is Flynn. (errr... can we think of a new name for that besides maiden? her pre-marriage name? her original name? her natural name? any suggestions out there?)

random aside: i had a bumper sticker at one point that I bought at a CDF conference (about 8 years ago) that said something like "I vote because kid's can't" -- i need to find that again.

mexico lindo

so, i'm a tease, aren't i? five minutes ago i posted that my blog entries were going to decrease then i turned around and posted another. just trying to keep you on your toes.

i wanna live in mexico again. our neighbors to the south are becoming more progressive as the U.S. is becoming regressive recessive more conservative with some of its social policies. Not only did Mexico City pass a civil union law in November but they are likely to legalize abortion soon. Though

he country's antiabortion activists pushed back last week by introducing a bill that would charge women who have illegal abortions with a one-to-three-year prison sentence -- already they face a sentence of six months to a year. (There had better be a clause in the bill for an increase in prison funding, though -- conservative estimates project that 110,000 or so women each year have illegal abortions in the country.) (read more)

I like the parenthetical comment. I couldn't have said it better.

Mexico has impressed me when I was there in 2002, 2003 and 2004. I attended the Pride March in 2002 and 2004 and also in 2004 I attended a convention for the 10th anniversary of the Catholics for Choice group. I also had the opportunity to attend HIV prevention conferences and other activist events with CETLALIC, the school I attended and volunteered with. None of the people I met, got to know and talked with could have ever imagined that such laws would have been passed in their lifetime... they hoped and hoped and hoped though. I'm so happy for Mexico... and my friends there.

un cafecito por favor

Well folks, I started my new job today, which might change how often I will be able to post... though my blog posts will decrease a little... my coffee intake will definitely increase. Therefore I have coffee on the brain.

I've been attempting to drink both fair-trade and organic coffee as often as possible ever since I read a little more about the process... particularly when I read A Cafecito Story by Julia Alvarez. Since I'm short on time this evening, I'm going to be totally lame and post a link to an article that caught my eye this evening. The article is from salon.com and talks about a recent USDA ruling that changed the requirements for organic certification that will potentially affect our access to organic coffee, among other organic goods...

oh phyllis...

believe it or not, i have some sympathy for phyllis schlafly. i said, some. she's really internalized a lot of the bull shit and finds herself spewing it something awful every once in awhile... most recently at Bates College. But hey, it starts people talking... or blogging. Here are some highlights from her presentation:

"She belittled the feminist movement as 'teaching women to be victims,' decried intellectual men as 'liberal slobs' and argued that feminism 'is incompatible with marriage and motherhood.'
...
One [disappointment] came when Schlafly asserted women should not be permitted to do jobs traditionally held by men, such as firefighter, soldier or construction worker, because of their 'inherent physical inferiority.'

'Women in combat are a hazard to other people around them,' she said. 'They aren't tall enough to see out of the trucks, they're not strong enough to carry their buddy off the battlefield if he's wounded, and they can't bark out orders loudly enough for everyone to hear.'

At one point, Schlafly also contended that married women cannot be sexually assaulted by their husbands.

'By getting married, the woman has consented to sex, and I don't think you can call it rape,' she said."

Ahhh! I need a beer. If it weren't so early in the morning, I'd go down the street to the Schlalfy Brewery here in St. Louis (her hometown). The beer company's President and Founder is Phyllis's nephew, Tom Schlafly... she, thankfully, isn't involved with the business. Incidentally, he recently published a book called A New Religion in Mecca - about beer and his brewery.

Sorry for that digression, back to my sympathy... it was Phyllis (among others) who fought so hard against the Equal Rights Amendment in the 70s & early 80s. Her website on the topic states that:

"The Equal Rights Amendment was presented to the American public as something that would benefit women, "put women in the U.S. Constitution," and lift women out of their so-called "second-class citizenship." However, in thousands of debates, the ERA advocates were unable to show any way that ERA would benefit women or end any discrimination against them. The fact is that women already enjoy every constitutional right that men enjoy and have enjoyed equal employment opportunity since 1964."

yeah. right. like getting raped in their own homes or while in the military that they shouldn't be in anyway. uh huh.

So, in a lovely coincidence, there is buzz that we're going to be seeing a renewed fight for the ERA again... this time under its new name WEA (Women's Equality Amendment). This is not the first time it has been reintroduced but maybe, just maybe, it will be the last time it has to be. It has been introduced in five states since January and has several federal and state lawmakers behind it.

Last time around only three needed states didn't ratify it. It needed 38 states and got 35. I've been reading that the 35 states would still stand, and the amendment would still only need three states. I've got people in five of the unratified states that I can call up - what about you?

can a poem hurt?

On News and Notes last night, I heard more about the two (non-Union) teachers at a LA charter school that were fired for planning to have their students read a poem about Emmett Till at a Black History assembly.

Emmett Till, a 14 year-old who lived in Chicago, was brutally murdered in 1955 in Mississippi when he was spending the summer with his great-Uncle. A few days after his arrival in his great-uncle's town, he allegedly whistled at a white woman. The white men that later admitted to the murder were acquitted - the deliberations took about an hour including a break to "make it look good". The jury, of course, was 12 white men.

The article in the LA Times reports that the charter school wanted to portray positive images of black people to the students, not negative ones. They also stated that they didn't want the poem to be read because Emmett could be accused of sexual harassment.

When I was in high school, I was actively involved with a club called PRISM that educated about racism and prejudice through theater - poems, skits, spoken word, dance, etc. In addition to performances at our school, we also traveled to other local schools, including grammar schools. The charter school in LA serves students in grades K - 7. Now I did not grow up in LA, and unlike this charter school (which is 80% black), my high school was majority white in the suburbs of Chicago. I will also note that the town I grew up in is not well-known for tolerating difference. However, PRISM, in my biased opinion, made a difference in how kids looked at race, racism and other forms of intolerance and bigotry. In the town that prides itself on fundamental Christian values, we had kids come up to us after our shows that had been affected, and hopefully changed if even a little, by our performances. I know it changed me when I was 14 and got involved with the group. It changed everything for me. My activism started then and hasn't ended.

I don't know the content of the poem the students were to perform at the L.A. charter school but I do know you can't celebrate black history by only showing positive aspects. History is complicated and children deserve to know it, all of it. PRISM was led by the only African-American teacher at my high school... she fought tooth and nail (almost daily, but especially in February) to keep our club in existence at our school. I'm afraid it doesn't exist anymore because she's no longer there - I'm not sure but I think she got tired of fighting. I hope I never get that tired.

Update: I just checked my high school's website... there are two clubs focusing on multiculturalism... Mosaic was formed to promote tolerance and an environment free from harassment for students from all walks of life. The mission of Mosaic is to provide education, strive to eliminate stereotypes, build bridges, and create opportunities to foster new relationships and The Multicultural club's mission is to celebrate the diversity of human life and ethnicity. Things we work on are our Culture Seed Week, Black History Assembly, Culture Outings, International Fashion Show and much, much more.

I've been thinking a lot about food lately

I don't like to post two entries in one day, but food has been on my mind and I want to write about it. As a child born in the late 70s, I grew up eating TV dinners and processed food. I won't even get into how ignorant I was (not too long ago) about cooking or the produce section of the grocery store. My grocery cart and cupboards used to be filled with microwaveable meals and other convenience foods. This has changed drastically in the past 8 months. My partner and I have started to eat healthily - and I've lost over 20 lbs. in the process. In the last couple of weeks, we've been attempting to eat only 'real food' or 'good food'. Funny how I put both in quotes. Anyway, eating real food is not easy... but I'm up for the challenge.

Though this change was initially brought on by a conversation with a friend of mine, it has only been reinforced almost daily in the past week or so. I've been reading The Omnivore's Dilemma and my friend Rachel's blog. Both will convince you, better than Fast Food Nation or Super Size Me ever did (or didn't), to change your eating habits. Neither FFN or SSM did much for me (besides confirm beliefs I already held) because I didn't really eat fast food anyway (except the BK veggie on road trips - or their french fries when i was hung over). Oh - and speaking of Burger King, the New York Times reported today that BK announced yesterday that they are going to start being more socially responsible about where they buy their eggs, pork and chicken. Way to go, BK. To check out the creative way that Free Range Studios is getting the word out about where our food comes from (and other topics), check out their 1-2 minute films.

Meanwhile, today's Diane Rehm show discussed the Food and Drug Administration's approval of allowing meat and milk from cloned animals into our food supply - without labeling it as such. If you watched last week's episode of This American Life, you know that a clone is not the same as the original animal, at least that's what Ralph and Sandra Fisher found out with Second Chance. The FDA says that food from clones is safe to eat but opponents, like the Union of Concerned Scientists, are... well, concerned. I am too.

what were you doing when you were 16?

I just ran across a fantastic film made by Kiri Davis, when she was 16. Davis is from New York city and her film is called 'A Girl Like Me' (2006). In the film, she interviews her peers about the experiences of black girls. She also recreates a study from the 1940s called "the doll test". This experiment was initially conducted by Drs. Kenneth & Mamie Clark to study how segregation effects black students. In the test, they gave black children two dolls, one white and one black and asked them a variety of questions like which they preferred and which was good or bad. The majority of the children preferred the white dolls.

"The Clarks concluded [from their study] that 'prejudice, discrimination, and segregation' caused black children to develop a sense of inferiority and self-hatred."

Their results were cited in Brown vs. Board of Education, the case that declared school segregation violated the fourteenth amendment. The Clarks were the first two black students to receive PhDs from Columbia University.

In her film, Kiri Davis recreates this study in today's Harlem (one of the many places in the US that school segregation still exists... oh but de facto instead of de jure, as if that makes it ok, eh?). In her experiment, 15 out of the 21 children preferred the white doll. These 15 children defined the white doll as good and pretty and the black doll as bad. What does this say about the progress made since the 1940s? A lot.

Watch this film if you have the opportunity - it's less than 8 minutes long. It was part of the 6th Annual Media That Matters film festival. Watch the other films in the festival too, that is what I would be doing right now if I didn't have to get ready for work. That's ok though, now I have something to look forward to. Maybe I'll watch one each day... and maybe you'll hear about them all here. Vamos a ver.

times they are a'changin'... maybe

Two days ago, the Chicago Tribune published a piece entitled 'Abolish the Death Penalty'. Yep, you read that right. The Trib has been for the death penalty for a little while ... ahem, since at least 1869.

Meanwhile, in Missouri, a Republican death penalty proponent, is sponsoring legislation that would halt the death penalty in MO until January 11, 2011 and create a Death Penalty Commission.

The commission will make recommendations for changes to the laws and court rules regarding death penalty cases to ensure that:

(1) Defendants who are sentenced to death are in fact guilty of first degree murder;

(2) Defendants are provided adequate counsel and adequate resources at trial and at the appellate and post-conviction stages;

(3) Race does not play an impermissible role in determining which defendants are sentenced to death;

(4) Appellate and post-conviction procedures are adequate to correct errors and injustices occurring at the trial level, including access to evidence for forensic testing; and

(5) Prosecutors throughout the state seek the death penalty in a uniform fashion.

The commission must issue a report of its findings to the Governor, General Assembly, and Missouri Supreme Court by January 1, 2011.

Gandhi said "An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth and the whole world would soon be blind and toothless." I wonder if people are starting to listen... I know that's awfully optimistic of me.

Don't know the death penalty law or stats for your state? Go to the Death Penalty Information Center's website.

ira glass is my hero

i've spent the last couple of days with my nieces, ages 5, 3.5, 2 and 6 weeks. This American Life's television show byline "Funny. Dramatic. Surprising. True." describes my weekend with them perfectly. I can't wait until they're old enough to appreciate 'This American Life', good thing I have quite a collection of the radio episodes saved on my computer... you know, for prosperity.

I was very sad when I first heard that Showtime was doing a TAL teevee show. I was sad that Ira was moving from my hometown of Chicago to New York and I was fearful that my favorite radio show would go away. He did move but he is insisting the radio show isn't going anywhere... and I believe him because Ira Glass is a man that can be trusted.

I watched the TAL episode on OnDemand prior to the 22nd. This made the 22nd anti-climatic - oh and one of the stories was a story they did on the radio show so i knew the ending, but that was ok. Rumor has it that you can watch the episode on their website (click on ira above). I'm happy with it. Ok, I'm not going to lie, I could very well be addicted to it'. It has a dreamy quality, the same wit and it really works. It works a lot better than I thought it could. I have another confession: we got cable in my house mostly so we could watch TAL... is that so wrong? I think there just might be something subliminal in the music they use in both the radio and teevee versions - you know, the type to make you addicted? Because I'm a little worried that my TAL addiction is unhealthy... though i suppose that there are unhealthier addictions so i'll stick with this one. And I don't believe it's interfering with my daily functioning.... yet.

i will say though that 48 hrs. with my nieces is interfering with my functioning... it was a fantastic weekend full of lots of playing, playing, playing but i am exhausted exhausted exhausted. No wonder kids (and their adults!) need naps!!

what if your phone rang 11 times a minute?

A couple of weeks ago, the National Network to End Domestic Violence released the results from their census of domestic violence providers. Approximately 62% of programs in the US participated in the census, so the results may not be completely representative - regardless, these results should not be ignored.

The Executive Summary (pdf) states that in a 24 hour period, 47,864 adults received services from a domestic violence agency and local, statewide and national hotlines received almost 17,000 calls (more than 11 hotline calls every minute).

Despite the prevalence of domestic violence, we (global we) still have a little bit of a problem dealing with it. An article on salon.com entitled 'Judge: Wife-beating is normal in your culture' caught my attention this morning. Though the specific case that this article refers to Muslims in Germany, this is not an uncommon response by some in the legal system (or outside of it...). In Germany, it seems, there is a one-year waiting period for those that want a divorce. A 26-year old Moroccan-born Germany woman was denied a fast-track divorce, despite the danger she was in, because the Judge said her situation was normal in her culture. I was a domestic violence court advocate in Chicago and often heard this dismissive response, particularly when I was advocating for/with immigrant or Latina survivors. Machismo, religion, immigrant status, etc. does not make violence ok or expected or 'normal. Nothing does. If you work with survivors or are just interested in this topic, I found a Muslim Wheel of Domestic Violence developed by Dr. Sharifa Alkhateeb. The wheel was adapted from the Duluth Power and Control Wheel. The original Duluth version has also been translated into spanish. The National Center on Domestic and Sexual Violence has a list of wheels for every occasion. Get yours today!

A dependency on normalcy is dangerous for all involved. Besides, who gets to define what is normal? And if something has been normal, does that mean it needs to stay normal? You know, like when 'whites only' signs were normal or it was normal that blacks and women couldn't vote? I could go on... but I think you get the picture. And, really, what the heck would we do with ourselves if treating each other with respect was normal in our culture, or any culture?

MTW: March 18, 1978 to March 22, 2002

i'm taking a blogger break today, as a sort of moment of silence for a dear friend of mine that this earth lost to suicide five years ago today. i miss you mikey.

what's up, doc?

I was going to try to have an upbeat post today because I feel like I've been Debbie Downer in this blog but I ran across this article in the NY Times and couldn't resist sharing it. Doctor's relationships with drug companies is extremely concerning to me. The group of doctors that receive the most payments are Psychiatrists, which adds to the concerns I expressed in a previous post. If you don't have time to read the article, here are a couple of snippets:

"research shows that doctors who have close relationships with drug makers tend to prescribe more, newer and pricier drugs — whether or not they are in the best interests of patients."

"Dr. Coyne recently wrote an editorial in an influential journal decrying guidelines written last year by the kidney foundation that encourage doctors to use more of Amgen’s drugs to treat anemia in kidney patients despite studies showing that increased use led to more deaths."

"Drug companies 'want somebody who can manipulate in a very subtle way,' said Dr. Frederick R. Taylor, a headache specialist in Minneapolis who earned more than $710,000 between 1997 and 2005, much of that from GlaxoSmithKline, the maker of the migraine drug Imitrex."

"A 2002 survey found that more than 80 percent of the doctors on panels that write clinical practice guidelines had financial ties to drug makers."

Who is your doctor sleeping with receiving money from? If we don't know, how can we find out?

i'm scared

About a month ago, three mean brutally beat an undocumented immigrant in Wright City, about 40 miles from where i'm sitting right now. They yelled "immigration enforcement" as they broke into his trailer and police are saying that it was likely a hate crime... uh, likely?

Top Three Reasons Why I'm Scared:

• This is the second "lynching" I've heard about in the past week. (I wrote about the other one a previous post.)

• I just found out about this yesterday when one of my students brought in a article about it. Where was the outcry!? How did a month go by without ongoing commentary?
  

• One of my other students said proudly, "yeah! my friend was there!" Yes, proudly.

today's doonsbury comic

do you know who is driving your child's school bus?

I heard on the news last night and read in the paper this morning that there is a concern that "extremists" are driving our nation's children to and from school. Neighborhood car pool gone wrong? Nope. According to the Associated Press, the FBI has reported that they are licensed school bus drivers.

Even with eye-catching headlines like FBI: Foreign extremists sign up to drive school buses or Some extremists driving school buses, officials warn, the text of all the articles I've found repeatedly say "parents and children have nothing to fear", "there is no reason for concern", "the government has no credible information to suggest terrorists are 'involved in buying school buses or seeking licenses to drive them" and that there was "no indication of any immediate threat to the country". The articles also vacillate between calling the bus drivers 'extremists' or sometimes, 'foreigners' or 'foreign nationals'.

I tried to find more information about this and after I couldn't find anything on the FBI website, ironically my googling led me to an article from one year ago today that reports on a program started by Homeland Security called School Bus Watch, where they train school bus drivers to fight terrorism. Maybe this is a product of that program?

This may be the kind of thing we should be informed of... maybe I can be especially blase' about it because I don't have children. But it makes me wonder about language like 'extremist' and 'foreigner' - I suppose in some circles, like among the fundamental Christians I grew up with, I could be considered an extremist, right? And foreigners? I heard on the news last night that there are a suspected 50,000 - 70,000 illegal Irish immigrants in the US. There are stereotypically some pretty extreme Irish folk... is this who is driving the school buses? I just don't know, since the article is so vague it almost seems like it's not news - this is what we've found out, but don't worry about it - it's like when what a witness says during testimony is stricken off the record and the jury is supposed to pretend it wasn't said.

It also makes me wonder about this 'culture of fear' - that will make people hole themselves up in their home out of fear of extremists lurking about. Or make people preemptively lash out at suspected extremists, using violence to make them feel safer. Like my Latino friend who was beat-up on September 12, 2001 because he was perceived to be of middle eastern descent.

If you're concerned about the person driving your child's school bus, talk to your school about what kinds of background checks they do or start a neighborhood car pool. If you can't trust your neighbors, who can you trust? Oh wait... trust is foreign in many neighborhoods. Damn. I guess we'll just have to home school. I better start practicing, luckily watching tv the other night made me realize that I am smarter than a fifth grader, it also made me realize that John Taylor Gatto was right about our schools.

ordinary people can do extraordinary things but what does it take?

When I was in college, I worked for a professor one summer researching a guy named Andre Trocme, a Protestant in France, who was responsible for hiding 5,000 Jewish refugees during the holocaust of World War II. I was fascinated by him and his work. For him, it was worth the risk... what made him different?

I just read in the most recent issue of Greater Good that violence happens when the object is stigmatized or dehumanized. The issue focuses on "the bystander's dilemma", also sometimes called the bystander effect, and discusses why we ignore people in need and when it is that we step in to help.

What does it take to be at a place where the humanity of a person, a person unlike you, is a priority? I do not have the answer. The Milestones Project and NYchildren.org are attempting to use photography to bring us closer together and help us see we are all the same. Spend some time on their sites if you have the opportunity.

The issue of "why didn't someone step in earlier or prevent this from happening" is in the news a lot... lately it's been talked about in news reports about Walter Reed Army Medical Center, Darfur, Iraqi refugees¹, etc. Personally, I've been thinking about this a lot because last week, my friend's friend, a gay guy from St. Louis, was severely beaten outside of a bar in Arizona and placed in a dumpster. He's in a coma now and not likely to survive. So, I wonder, how can this happen? And, I suppose more importantly, how can we stop it from happening?

When people step in or speak up, they certainly put themselves at risk. This is why kids don't stand up for the kid that's being bullied, neighbors don't call the cops when they hear domestic violence and possibly why Kitty Genovese died. But there are also countless stories of when people do intervene. What can we learn from those? I read in this issue of Greater Good about two such people: Jabar Gibson and Sergeant Joseph Darby. Jabar Gibson, a 20 year-old with an extensive criminal history, drove an abandoned school bus filled with 70 Katrina survivors for 13 hours to the Houston Astrodome, and was the first to arrive. Sergeant Darby, at age 24, is credited for reporting the abuses at Abu Ghraib prison. Gibson is back in prison awaiting trial on new criminal charges, unrelated to his driving the renegade school bus. Sergeant Darby is in protective custody and in hiding due to threats received against him and his family. Andre Trocme was arrested and released... but when the Nazis arrested Trocme's cousin and sent him to a death camp, Andre went into hiding but his work was carried on by his wife and other people from his village. That, my friends, is the key - no matter what happens how can we carry on the good work?

I'll continue to write about this issue and present ideas... any suggestions, thoughts or comments are appreciated. (Sorry the post is a little scattered, ms. cambio is a little distracted today)

¹ The report I heard on NPR stated that the majority of refugees, at least in Syria, report having a loved one kidnapped. However, the article reports that these refugees would not be eligible to come to the United States because "under U.S. law, anyone who pays money to kidnappers, even under duress, is considered to have supported a terrorist group" And, uh, Mr. Rule Maker, just a quick question: what would YOU do if your loved one was kidnapped?

fostering addiction?

In my day job, I supervise volunteer advocates for children in foster care. I just received an email from an advocate who is concerned about the amount of medication prescribed to the teen she is working with. This teen's parents' rights were terminated when she was little and she was adopted by her grandmother. She was taken back into the system in 2003 when her grandmother passed away. This teen takes the following each day:

• Seroquel (200 mg.) 1 tablet at bedtime
• Lamictal (25 mg.) 1 tablet 3 times daily - 8 am, 4 pm, 8 pm
• Adderall XR (30 mg) 1 table daily @ 8 am
• Guanfacine (2 mg.) 1 tablet 2 times daily - 8 am, 4 pm
• Loratadine (10 mg) 1 tablet daily
• Ranitidine (150 mg) 1 tablet 2 times daily - 8 am, 4 pm

Not all of the above drugs are psychotropics. Guanfacine is for high blood pressure, Loratadine is for allergies (aka Claritin) and Ranitidine (aka Zantac) for ulcers and acid reflux. Seroquel, Lamictal, and Adderall are used for PTSD, Bipolar Disorder, Schizophrenia, Epiplepsy, ADHD and/or Depression. Yet, according to a report from last fall, her only diagnoses are "child abuse and neglect" and "adjustment disorder with mixed disturbed of emotions and conduct". She sees a therapist every week, however she has not had a consistent therapist due to the high rate of staff turnover. Not to mention that she is in her eighth placement in four years.

I am not this teen's therapist, psychiatrist or even her advocate. However, this teen has asked multiple times to be taken off of her medication, and I believe the residential facility considering the possibility. My concern, along with her advocate's and other advocates I supervise, is that it seems that children in foster care are overmedicated - a concern sometimes referred to as chemical restraint. By virtue of being in foster care, these children have suffered multiple traumas and major loss along with separation and adjustment issues. Since this current regimen was put in place, this particular teen has been incredibly sleepy and her grades have been dropping. She complains about the side effects and the advocate, who has been working with her for three years has noticed a marked change. She is a zombie, but hey - at least she's not acting out anymore! But what does this mean for her life and her future?

What's in it for the residential facility, I wonder? With a little googling, I discovered a CBS article that reported that at least in Los Angeles, more medicated kids can mean more funding:

"Because most foster kids who receive drugs are classified as problem children and by contract, group homes get paid more for those kids.
'When you have a group home full of kids sleeping, you don't have to deal with them,' Walker said. 'It's a good thing for them, they get paid, they get a nice fat paycheck.'"

In all of the cases I oversee, the children are medicated starting at an early age. Sometimes I wonder if is this for the children's benefit or the adults? More often I wonder if it is the pharmaceutical companies that benefit the most¹? Kids who have been traumatized are going to act out, do we control them through medication or figure out how to help them work through their trauma, grief, and loss? An article on citylimits.org reports that kids in foster care are more likely to be prescribed medication and that a University of Minnesota study found that compared to 15 percent of the general population, 35 percent of St. Louis County foster children were on psychotropics. If you take out infants in foster care, who I assume are not on psychotropics, 35% is an even larger percent of the population. I've read that kids are prescribed psychotropics as early as preschool.

I know this is a long entry (I think I could easily write a dissertation on this topic!), but I have one more comment on this issue. Last fall, I went to a panel presentation by Let's Start Inc. (pdf), a fantastic organization in St. Louis that helps "women build successful lives after incarceration". One of the women told her story which included growing up in the foster system, her struggle with substance abuse and multiple incarcerations. She eloquently spoke of when she was first prescribed psychotropic medications that "all of the mess in her head" dissipated... which, for her at least, was a logical first step to her later substance abuse. By using prescribed and illicit drugs, she was able to avoid her problems and didn't start dealing with them and really working through them until recently. She's at least 40 years old.

Check out this resource from Florida on Legal Strategies to Challenge Chemical Restraint of Children in Foster Care.

¹The latest issue of Good Magazine has a short piece about the profits and patents of pharmaceutical companies, I don't have it with me right now but will try to post some of the information later today or tomorrow.

halliburton: it's not you, it's me - all about me

NPR reported today that Halliburton is leaving us (ahem... the U.S.) for Dubai, a locale described as Las Vegas on steroids. I could have seen this coming... when I read about Dubai in January's National Geographic. Dubai is nice enough to offer liberal and low-taxes... Halliburton won't be the last to take advantage. I wonder what Halliburton's strategic plan looks like? Probably something like this:

2000 Get Cheney in the White House
2003 Get White House to bomb the shit out of Iraq, start war
2003 - present Reap billions of dollars in profits

Then what happens? Houston too humid? Nope... a hot seat of a different kind. Last month, federal investigators allege that Halliburton has overcharged or not documented 2.7 billion in expenditures. They aren't the only ones lining their pockets with this bloodbath. This has been going on for some time, but now that the war is less popular, they might actually go after them... or will they? Meh.

Well, someone in congress is paying attention: Senator Patrick Leahy, a Democrat from Vermont. He's quoted as saying "This is an insult to the U.S. soldiers and taxpayers who paid the tab for their no-bid contracts and endured their overcharges for all these years," The Senator is working on the The War Profiteering Prevention Act of 2007. Good luck, man. If not that, what is war good for?

preemptive FAQ

1. Why 'my silence is your comfort'?

Ever since I was 14, I have been speaking out against injustices. Some find it easier to stay silent, I find it a necessity to speak up and inform when necessary. Change is impossible without rabble-rousers. But those that benefit from the status-quo get very uncomfortable with rabble-rousing. To paraphrase Harriet Woods, "Quality people aren't threatened by equality".

2. What does 'cambioymuerte' mean?

It comes from the lyrics of an Ozomatli song:

"En la vida hay dos cosas ciertas: son la muerte y el cambio"

[In life there are two certain things: death and change]

I switched it around because before I die, I'm dead set on making change. (pun intended)

3. So, cambio, what do you plan on doing with this here blog?

I will be posting news, pictures, etc. that I come across throughout my day... the kind of stuff that people try to silence... don't want to talk about... or wanna pretend doesn't happen.